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Spices

Why is it that salt and pepper are the only two spices allocated to every table in almost every restaurant? Why no nutmeg? Garlic salt? Cinamon? What makes our custom eschew the lesser used spices in favor of these two honored ones? Could there be a conspiracy by a salt mining labor organization in conjunction with a pepper mill? What if you are in a McDonald's and you get a hankering for a dash of cumin on your Big Mac? Well, you are out of luck - you have two choices - salt, pepper - pick one. What kind of Nazi state do we live in that we are limited in our seasoning in such a unilateral way? And you know, they'll take pepper away one day. Sooner or later you will go to Friendly's and find only lonely NaOH. But then it will be too late. No one knows why our spices are being limited, but someday we'll be left with none and it will be a very grey, bleak, and bland day at that. So we are doomed to be stranded with these two spices much like a mormon who restricts himself to but two wives never to taste the sweet tang of mint or thyme.

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